A Rebel in the Roses
Black Rebel Riders’ MC Book 8
This is a work of fiction. Names characters, places and incidents either are the product of the author’s imagination or used fictitiously and any resemblance to actual people, alive or dead, business, establishments, locals or events is entirely coincidental. Any reference to real events, business, organizations or locals is intended only to give the fiction a sense of realism and authenticity. All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted by any means – electronic, mechanical, photographic (photocopying), recording, or otherwise – without prior permission in writing from the author.
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The heat beats down on my back, my sweat soaking through my t-shirt. At least I blame the Florida sun. I’m sitting in the back of a dive bar waiting for my oldest child, my son—Striker. I guess that’s no longer his name though, goes by some bullshit name, Nash.
Taking a hard swig of my longneck bottle of Bud, I scan the room. Meeting him isn’t wise, but Grim promised me if I did this, he’d allow me to walk away from the club for good. Only problem is, I don’t know if I want to.
The MC is in my blood, it courses through my veins. That isn’t why I’m here though. Closing my eyes, I wipe the sweat beading across my forehead with a napkin. I’ve never been a fearing man, but I don’t know the man I’m about to meet. I knew the boy he once was, but not the man he is today. There’s a lot of bad blood between us, but he’s my blood, whether I wanted him or not. More than that, he’s alive and well, taking care of the woman I’ve always loved, Baby.
I think back on all the mistakes I made with her, with my life. If I knew then what I know now, I’d do so many things differently. I’d be a goddamned liar if I said knowing she’s alive doesn’t change the way I feel, but I’ll never act on my feelings.
No matter how deep they run.
I owe her and my boy more than that.
I’m a bastard and I know it, but I can’t change what’s come to pass.
I think Grim told me about her, brought me here just to fuck with me harder.
Somehow he knows just how fucking much I care about his daughter.
Right, wrong doesn’t matter.
I’m here today to bury that shit deep.
I’m here to forget that I know how it feels when I bury my tongue deep inside her, touching her in places a man could only ever dream of reaching.
Damn, if she wasn’t too good for a man like me.
I can see her now, her red hair fanning out on my pillow, her naked chest rising and falling next to me after we’ve touched and tasted every inch of one another skin to skin in carnal sin.
I swallow hard knowing I won’t think of Baby in this way again, until I’m dying, maybe not even then. A smile forms on my lips, I can hear her in my mind calling me a damned fucking liar. A bad one at that. Her cheeks would bloom matching the color of a pink rose, her favorite color.
It’s been years, and still I long to feel her, to touch her…God to be inside her.
I inhale deeply trying to remember the way she smelled and I wonder if she ever misses me like I miss her. Does she ever roll over at night and clutch her chest wishing I was next to her? Does she have any regrets like I do? It would be so much easier had I not known the goddamn truth. It was so much damn easier to let Sunshine in, to allow myself to feel for her, but how do you go on once you know the truth? Do you continue living the lie? I don’t have much of a choice.
I don’t deserve to remember her.
To want her.
To love her, and crave everything about her.
Sunshine has done damn fucking good to close the gaping hole in my heart where my love for Baby used to be. Fuck, Baby is still buried deep within me, I’ll never be rid of her. I’d be a damn fool to pretend otherwise, but to everyone else I’ll hide that shit away. Tuck it away and pretend she isn’t a part of me, so much so when I close my eyes all I see is her honey whiskey eyes burning with such desire.
When I open my eyes, the son I never wanted is sitting across from me, wearing a murderous expression on his face. I don’t know if he realizes it, but he favors me with the way he’s got his hair cut and the style of his beard.
Staring at him is like looking through a mirror and seeing the motherfucking past. He’s me inside and out. He can deny it all he wants, but I see it and I’m sure Baby does too. I smile at her name as it hangs on the edge of my mind. Does she ever think of me when she fucks him?
I’m so fucked in the head.
“What do you want?” he snarls curling his top lip.
“You look good son.”
“Don’t.” He shakes his head with a devious laugh. “Don’t come here doing that shit. I’ve never been your son. Never will be.”
“You sure about that. Christ! I think you hate me because when you look at me, when you think about me, you see yourself, and that shit scares you. I couldn’t tame Baby and hold onto her. And you wonder when the day will come when you will fuck up again, and she will leave for good. You’re scared that one day she will find her way back to me. But you can rest easy boy, that’s the past, this is the now. You won. Gloat, bask in her pussy and treat her like a goddamned queen.”
He rakes his fingers through his hair and slaps his hands down ready to walk out. “I’m not doing this.”
A pretty little thing comes over to take our order. Nash orders a beer and I order another with an appetizer, even though I won’t be able to eat a damn bite.
“Fuck, listen, that isn’t why I’m here. If you don’t want to accept me as your old man I understand. I never wanted you anymore than you do me. No love lost.” I say the words knowing I don’t mean them. Fucking Grim. I don’t know why I’m bothering with this shit.
He sits back as the server brings us chips and salsa and two new beers. Once she leaves, he takes a long drink. He looks good. Despite being here with me he appears happy. My eyes fall on his wedding band, and I don’t dare ask the question that is hanging from the tip of my tongue. Ever since Grim told me the truth she’s been on my mind. I just want her to be happy and hope my son is giving her the life she deserves, her and Colt. Just knowing she isn’t dead and that her smile still exists is the best fucking gift I could ever hope for. It’s also my worst fucking nightmare.
“Why are you here? I fucking knew I should have sent Liberty packing, she tip you off?” His nostrils flare as he scratches the back of his neck.
“Tread has some shit to shovel. We need you. Simple as that. Besides, I brought you a gift.”
“You ain’t got a motherfucking thing I’ll ever want.”
“I brought your Indian.”
His eyes widen. That’s what I thought. He loved that damn bike more than anything, well, almost anything.
“Thought maybe you’d want to give it to your boy–Colt someday.”
Nash peels at the edges of the label on his beer. I give him the minute he clearly needs.
“You really brought it?”
“Yeah, Rebel gave it to me. He’d been storing it.”
“Don’t say his name.” he clenches his fist. “He’s dead to me.”
“I hear ye.”
“He know anything?”
“Nah.” I shake my head.
We talk a spell about Foxie and he relaxes hearing that Grim has been good to her. As much as he hates his brother, he listens as I tell him about what decent man he is trying to be. He even smiles faintly when I tell him about Chelle and the kids. I don’t know if Christopher and Thomas can repair their relationship someday. I know it tears Foxie up having them at odds, lying to everyone about what really happened some years ago. Everything happens for a reason, even if we don’t like it or understand it.
After two more beers and an order of wings my son actually pulls his phone out to show me a picture of his family, of her—Baby.
Her hair is much darker, but I’d know her from miles away, if my eyes could see that far. She’s still the prettiest damn woman I’ve ever seen. My dick stirs, my body and my heart betraying my mind.
My son is watching me, being cautious, but I’m careful not to let my emotions shine through.
It’s time to bury this shit and be done.
It’s time I be the father I never have been.
I tell him what fine looking kids he has. Tell him that Sara has her momma’s sass and Colt has his smirk. I don’t mention that he has mine as well. I even comment that Baby looks real happy. A much as it shreds me on the inside, she does look happy and that’s enough for me. It damn well has to be.
“I got something to say to you and I’m just going to say it, because I need to. And you need to hear it whether you want to listen or not.”
He nods. “Get on with it then. I’ve got a family to get home to.”
“I’m just going to cut to it. I shouldn’t have fucked your wife. I should be sorry and in ways I am. But we can’t go back. After we do this shit with Tread you don’t need to worry about seeing my sorry mug ever again, unless you look in the damn mirror. You know and I know you look a hell of a lot like me boy. You can deny it but we both know it’s true. You don’t like me and I don’t fucking like you, but you are my blood and if ye ever need me, if ye kids ever need me, all you gotta do is say the word.” I don’t dare say if Baby needs me, but he knows I’d do any damn thing for her without my reminding him.
I toss a few twenties on the table. “Bike is across the street at the hotel.” I hand him the keys.
“Heard you built a beast. I’d like to see it.”
“We’ll see. How long you here for?”
“Too damn long.” I haven’t been here a few hours and I’m itching to get the hell away from here. The urge to see Baby is too damn strong. I need to get home, back to Sunshine.
I know he’s having a hard time digesting my words. It’s a lot to swallow. I’m not good at this but I’m trying.
I stand and wait for him to finish his beer.
I’m sitting across from my sperm donor, listening as he spews his word vomit at me, pretending he gives a shit about me. He’s never gave two fucks about me. Only reason he’s here is because he is hoping to catch a glimpse of what’s mine, what he’ll never have—my wife, my kids. He will never set foot in my house. He’s a dirty old bastard and I’ll kill him first. I’ve come too far to lose what I got. Not that I think Karly wants him. We’ve worked through that bullshit. I know she loves me and I trust her. It’s this motherfucker and his twisted thoughts that concern me. Now that he knows she’s alive will he make a play for her once again?
Romeo hands me the keys to my Indian, but there’s no way in hell I’m starting it up without checking it out first. He may be my father but I don’t trust him. If he talks about how much alike we are one more time I’m going to break his goddamn nose.
Shoving the keys in my pocket, I follow him across the street to the Pelican.
I should’ve been on the road hours ago. Karly told me to stay here and offered to drive up, but this shit tonight is exactly why she needed to keep her ass home.
Tomorrow is the reveal of the bike I built. The garage is doing a contest. Winner gets the bike. We’re hosting a burnout contest. It’s supposed to drum up business. Things are taking off though. Karly is still working at the women’s shelter and loving it. Her and the kids are home in Miami thank fuck. I don’t know why Grim wants to drag me into Tread’s shit. Him having contact with me is fucking dangerous. I don’t like it, but Grim helped get me and Karly our fresh start, he’s her dad, and I’ll do anything for her.
I pledged my loyalty to him when he put a bullet in my old man Slim’s head. He wasn’t the best father, but he was all I had. However, my fealty to Grim didn’t end the day my new life began. Drag Creek runs straight through my heart, coursing through my veins. My Black Rebel blood will never die.
If one of them call on me, I will always step up and ride free or die trying.
I chuckle as Stri-Nash tells me about my grandkids. Sounds like they give their mom a run for her money. My baby girl was a hellcat when she was a kid, I’m sure she still is even if she’s all grown up with a life that is all her own now.
No matter how far apart we are or where this crazy life takes us, she’ll always be my girl. I’d move heaven and earth to give her the stars if she said the word. She wouldn’t even have to ask.
I wish I could see them in person, but we don’t have time for that, and it isn’t safe. I shouldn’t be dragging Nash into this shit with Tread but we need him.
He looks over his former flame, his Indian, and the longing to ride her is apparent in his eyes. He caresses her handlebars, stroking the seat with love and care. If he treats my daughter and grandkids as good as his bike, then I can leave here content.
“Nice night for a ride,” I tell him needing to get this show on the road.
“It is,” he says with caution. The boy ain’t dumb. I’d be leery too in his shoes. His dark brows are furrowed as he stares past me at his father. He’s got plenty enough reasons not to trust Romeo or his word, but I wouldn’t burn him. I won’t let Romeo ruin what he’s got going on here.
“Not that it isn’t good to see your ugly faces, but what’s the deal. Why are you here?”
Tread speaks up. “Look man, you’re one of my oldest friends. We go way back. I know ye got a good thing going here and I wouldn’t call on ye if I didn’t need ye brother. I thank ye for stepping up and getting Libby and my boy home to me, where they belong. That piece of shit that touched what’s mine has been making threats. He thought being states away made him a badass. I’m here to show him you don’t fuck with BRR MC and not get dealt what’s coming. Ye feel me?”
“I feel ye man. I’ll ride or die trying with you any day. But that motherfucker…” he points to Romeo. “I’m not riding next to him.”
If he wasn’t so damn serious it’d be almost comical. His hard grimace matching that of the man he refuses to accept. Can’t rightly blame him though. I don’t exactly like riding next to him either, but he’s the best damn sorry excuse of a friend I’ve got.
Sounds like a bad start of a country ballad.
Four riders out to settle a score.
I’m so motherfuckin’ ready to go pop holes in the piece of shit motherfucker who put his hands on my boy and my woman. I can’t wait to end him, get back home to Libby, and fill her with my seed—planting more babies in her belly.
Truth and Amy found out they’re expecting a few days ago.
Honestly, their kid could be mine, but no one says shit about it. I sure as fuck don’t plan on it. I’d never take that away from him. It doesn’t matter, the baby growing inside of Amy will be Grady’s in name and in blood regardless.
He’s so damn proud already, swearing it’s gonna be a boy. I hope like hell it is. He’s gonna make one hell of a father.
I’m trying with Kyler, trying so damn hard to do right by him and make up for the time we’ve lost, but here I am on the road, missing out once more. After I put John to ground no fucking more. I’m gonna be the best damn dad around.
Libby didn’t want me to come but she wouldn’t ask me to stay. She wants the bastard to pay and knows I’ll see to it that he does. Can’t wait to get home and balls deep inside her.
My cock stretches against my zipper thinking about her curves. Her lips on my neck as I drive hard into her pussy as she squeezes me tight.
Before I got on the road she gave me one hell of a sendoff.
She had my cock in her mouth, between her titties, in that sweet pussy, and up that tight ass. Fucking heaven being in her and hell knowing I had to leave her. Her thick ass cheeks reddened from my hands. Libby’s nails scratching down my back. My skin still burns from her love marks. Just one simple touch from her can make my damn cock erupt.
She has me so damn high on her love, I’d swear I floated from Kentucky to Florida.
I’m here for her to avenge the wrongs done to her and Kyler.
“So this bike you built. Do you announce the winner?”
“Yeah. Why?” He looks from me to Grim ignoring Romeo. “Fuck, the dude right.”
Grim grunts. “It’s the cleanest way.”
“How do you know he’s going to win the burnout contest? Not something I can rig.”
“Because I’ll make damn sure he does.” Romeo speaks up. “Truth has been chatting him up online posing as a broad who says she wants to meet him at the contest.”
“We brought a girl with us to play his whore and demand he takes her for a ride. You only put enough gas in the tank to make sure he only rides as far as we want him too. We’ll stage a mugging gone wrong and have a witness to back it up.”
“Sounds almost too easy.” I watch my oldest friend pace the parking lot pinching the bridge of his nose. He agrees to the plan reluctantly.
I’ve tried calling my husband four times tonight with no response. He told me something had come up and he’d tell me details when he could. I trust him but it doesn’t stop old feelings from festering their way to the top. I don’t think he’s stepping out on me, but it isn’t like him not to send me a text or something. He hates it when he can’t reach me. What if something happened to him. What if someone recognized him and settled an old score.
I can’t take the silence. I can’t take the not knowing.
So here I am with my kids strapped in the car making the drive to Daytona to track his ass down. I’m going to find him, then I’m going to kiss him, fuck him, and kill him all at the same time. Asshole. I swear if he is with someone or doing something shady…so help me God!
We’ve been doing good for too long. Liberty showing up was the tip of the iceberg. Then Lucky…had to push his buttons. Nash knows I’d never go down that road again. We’ve come too far for me to turn back on all that we have now. That’s why I am more worried that something has happened to him. I really don’t think he’d step out on me, before hell yeah, but we’re different. We’ve grown together and I know there is nowhere he’d rather be than next to me. So for him to not come home tonight and to ignore my calls… something is wrong.
It’s only a four-hour drive. I told Nash he didn’t have to come home every night during the rally but he insisted. I even offered to take time off from work and drive up with the kids, but he said no. He doesn’t want me there, where people might know me—us.
I know he wants to be my protector and he does a damn good job at it, but who is going to watch out for him?
Who has his back?
He doesn’t ride with the Black Rebel Riders’ any longer.
He doesn’t have the security of his family at his back and by his side.
His going up to Daytona was dangerous and a mistake.
I don’t want the kids to know I’m scared. I told them we were going to surprise daddy and have us a little vacation. Because Bike Week is the perfect destination to take your kids, I snort to myself as Cole and Sara sing along to Sweet Home Alabama.
My head pounds as they compete to see who can sing the loudest.
As I enter the city limits my phone beeps with a call from my husband. Too bad he didn’t call me before I hit the road.
“Where are you?” I grit out attempting to sound calm and collected for the sake of our kids. We try not to argue in front of them if we can help it. Some days are harder than others.
“Got tied up with the guys, I’m sorry babe. I swear to you on everything that I’m just going to get that room the garage reserved for me at the Pelican and crash. I had one beer too many.”
“Okay. I love you. Talk to you soon.”
“Love you too. I’ll call you in the morning. Kiss the kids for me. I miss you.”
“Miss you too.”
“Momma, why didn’t you tell daddy we were coming?” Cole asks.
“It’s a surprise,” I remind him and he nods and goes back to singing.
Holy biker! I knew it would be crowded but there is an ocean of motorcycles.
“Whoa,” Cole says slowly with his nose pressed against the window.
“Yeah, whoa. Put your eyes back in your head.” I laugh knowing he is seeing all the scantily clad women. Just like his dad. Never can let a pretty woman pass unnoticed.
Sara has passed out in her carseat oblivious to the wild world around her.
Nothing could prepare me for who is in the parking lot at the Pelican.
My chest constricts and I can’t breathe as my tears flood my vision.
I nearly hit a motorcycle, and not just any one either.
One with Romeo sitting on it.
What the fuck are they doing here? Tread too.
This isn’t good. I don’t know whether to shit or get off the pot.
I stop the car, resting my head against the steering wheel overcome with so many emotions.
Cole is jumping out of the car and running to his dad. “Surprise! Mom said we were gonna spend a few days here with you. Have you seen all the babes!” I have to laugh even though my future is colliding with my past.